Today I'm hosting my very own pity party, complete with cussing, ranting, venting, mockery, sarcasm and childish tantrums. When I'm done, I will snap out of it. But now it's time to PARTY.
I suck. I suck at school work because I'm a lazy ass who puts my work off until the last minute, and then when the last minute rolls around I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to get everything done, doing it half-assed and wondering why I waited so long. Why did I wait so long anyway? Truth be told, I hate school. I work all day and I have a child. I resent having to take my free time reading stuff I don't want to read, and then writing papers about the shit that I don't want to read. I want to do other things....anything. Just not school work. Often times lately I thought, "what am I doing this for anyway?" The economy fucking sucks.....20 somethings fresh out of college can barely find jobs, what makes me think I'm going to be so special? Oh yeah plus I'm putting myself in more debt. Just what I need. But I can't stop now......well, I shouldn't anyway.
I suck at losing weight. I am working my ass off. I have been going to the gym every day, now switching it up until mornings. Up until this week, there was no way I could get out of bed to go to the gym. But thanks to my friend A, we have been motivating each other to wake up. So I'm burning tons of calories and I'm eating way better than I used to eat. Not perfect....but much, much better. I step on the scale this morning, I haven't lost anything this week. What the fuck? Yes there were a couple of times that I didn't do great, but it could have been worse. Yesterday I did eat more than usual, so I'm hoping that is why I didn't see a loss. This upcoming week I'm doing an experiment. I'm staying within a certain amount of calories, no junk and making sure I work out every day, just to see if I lose. If I don't, then I'm throwing my hands in the air and saying Fuck it! I will embrace my fatness and be happy eating what I want. Or fake being happy, either/or.
I'm hungry today and it won't go away. Not after the bowl of cereal I ate for breakfast, or the 1/2 cup pineapple I ate for snack, or the ham sandwich that I ate for lunch......an hour early......and I'm still hungry. I haven't been hungry like this in a while! I don't like it. It kind of hinders the whole weight loss thing. I'm annoyed. I want to eat what I want.
Needy Nate has calmed down on the texts and calls. In fact he left me alone for the most part the last two days, only sending me an email Tuesday night asking me how my day was and how my homework was coming. I also got an email this morning asking me if I'm ok. Am I ok???? Why? Because you didn't hear from me? What the fuck dude....you don't know me well enough to even care if I'm ok so what the fuck? I know I should type him an email letting him know I'm not in to this, I just have to think of what to say. Or just ignore, I don't know and don't care right now. He ruined it with his needy ways!!! I want to tell him to PISS OFF!
I will never again in my life suffocate someone via text & email.
One cool thing. Angelina Jolie and crew are here for the next couple of weeks shooting some scenes for a new movie she's doing called "Salt" They are doing car chase scenes on the bridges here right near where I work. The good part: I can see if from where I'm working. Bad part: My exit to get to work will be closed. Fun but what the fuck?
Oh one other thing......my bosses have had less meetings lately, which means they are here more. Which means I can't do whatever I want and have to pretend to be busy, look busy even when I'm not. I am lucky to have a job, yes. But fuck, sometimes I'm so bored I can't stand it.
Ok I'm done now.
Showing posts with label annoyed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label annoyed. Show all posts
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Don't get it TWISTED...
Since I find myself completely blog-sessed lately, I decided to start one of my own. I have been burdened with complete obsession, spending hours reading blogs. Why, I have no idea. Actually it started out being just two blogs that I read faithfully. The very first one I read came from the WW site that I frequent from time-to-time whenever I "decide" that I need to change my eating and workout habits. I read her story about how her life and it was moving enough that I decided (that's a frequently used word for me, you'll see...) that I wanted to continue reading. Then I was hooked. What makes me hooked to a blog, you ask?
I am attracted to humorous bloggers that keep me chuckling or something simple as being able to relate to their daily life. So I have three preferred blogs as of now, but I won't mention them just yet because they don't know me (guess that makes me a stalker? LOL) and I haven't asked them if I could do it, but I will.
My very first blog is taking place at work. The main reason being that today I refuse to do any work. I'm on my own personal strike. I'm also bubbling with rage at my co-worker.
Ugh if you only knew. Ok let me try to explain.
We have two secretaries here, with me being one of them (there used to be three but they decided not to hire another secretary when the last one left). Anyway the other lady is a above me, but not my boss and not really considered a "secretary" because she's more like an assistant. (Hey I work for the state, we are real big on Titles that don't mean shit!) which is fine with me. But what really bugs me is she's involved in this project that always keeps her at meetings (I especially love the lunchtime meetings which leaves me the option of either not taking a lunch, or going at 2:00 in the afternoon - which in that case I'll be lucky if I get a parking spot when I return). The meetings I can't really say anything about. But what really irritates me to no end is that she's CONSTANTLY leaving her desk to go visit with people (a.k.a. gossip). And we're not talking a few minutes, I'm talking anywhere from 1/2 hour to an hour. The other day I was so irritated at her because she left for a half hour, came back for a half hour, left again and then had the nerve to take a lunch, followed by another meeting from 2:30 - 4:00. The rage was bubbling inside me and I had to punish her with silence, because that's what I do. LOL
Another thing that irritates me.....whenever I have to leave early, she picks some time anywhere from 15-30 mins before I'm supposed to leave and she leaves her desk to go socialize. But what she likes to do is return to her desk around 5 minutes after I'm supposed to have already left. I like to make sure that by the time she returns, I have my bags on the desk, sunglasses on my head, and I'm sitting on the end of my chair, and staring at the door. For real. LOL So when she comes in, I pop up and then literally while I'm RUNNING out the door I say, I gotta go I'm late. LOL. I think she gets the point, but yet she still continues to do this.
Ok I'm done venting. Today I'm having one of those days where I'm annoyed at her. Other days I think she's great, especially when she tells me I can leave early. See, I want my cake and eat it too. Who wouldn't want to eat their cake? What.
I am attracted to humorous bloggers that keep me chuckling or something simple as being able to relate to their daily life. So I have three preferred blogs as of now, but I won't mention them just yet because they don't know me (guess that makes me a stalker? LOL) and I haven't asked them if I could do it, but I will.
My very first blog is taking place at work. The main reason being that today I refuse to do any work. I'm on my own personal strike. I'm also bubbling with rage at my co-worker.
Ugh if you only knew. Ok let me try to explain.
We have two secretaries here, with me being one of them (there used to be three but they decided not to hire another secretary when the last one left). Anyway the other lady is a above me, but not my boss and not really considered a "secretary" because she's more like an assistant. (Hey I work for the state, we are real big on Titles that don't mean shit!) which is fine with me. But what really bugs me is she's involved in this project that always keeps her at meetings (I especially love the lunchtime meetings which leaves me the option of either not taking a lunch, or going at 2:00 in the afternoon - which in that case I'll be lucky if I get a parking spot when I return). The meetings I can't really say anything about. But what really irritates me to no end is that she's CONSTANTLY leaving her desk to go visit with people (a.k.a. gossip). And we're not talking a few minutes, I'm talking anywhere from 1/2 hour to an hour. The other day I was so irritated at her because she left for a half hour, came back for a half hour, left again and then had the nerve to take a lunch, followed by another meeting from 2:30 - 4:00. The rage was bubbling inside me and I had to punish her with silence, because that's what I do. LOL
Another thing that irritates me.....whenever I have to leave early, she picks some time anywhere from 15-30 mins before I'm supposed to leave and she leaves her desk to go socialize. But what she likes to do is return to her desk around 5 minutes after I'm supposed to have already left. I like to make sure that by the time she returns, I have my bags on the desk, sunglasses on my head, and I'm sitting on the end of my chair, and staring at the door. For real. LOL So when she comes in, I pop up and then literally while I'm RUNNING out the door I say, I gotta go I'm late. LOL. I think she gets the point, but yet she still continues to do this.
Ok I'm done venting. Today I'm having one of those days where I'm annoyed at her. Other days I think she's great, especially when she tells me I can leave early. See, I want my cake and eat it too. Who wouldn't want to eat their cake? What.
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