Wednesday, June 10, 2009

WHY????

I had a whole post that I typed out at work in an email so I could copy and paste it here. But I forgot......I can't paste in blogger. WHY????? I wanted to vent about my bad day and this is the sprinkles on the icing of my cake.

That is all.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Week 1 Success

I have to write this quick because I'm late leaving for work already. But I had success with my first low carb week. I lost 7 lbs! I was actually at the 7 lb mark last Thursday and the scale hasn't moved since then (well, it went up once....what!) but I still consider it a success because a) "Auntie Flo" is in town and I have major bloatedness and b) I had a couple of minor slip ups on the weekend.

Yesterday morning I did not wake up to workout at the gym. So I came home and did 1/2 hour of aerobics. I didn't burn near as many calories but at least it was some movement. This morning I DID wake up but did not go to the gym because I was irritated at someone and lost in thought. But I plan on getting a walk in at lunch and another half hour tonight. I really need to start weights and even more so, I really need to start doing crunches.

I'm spending more money on food which I don't like. But I'm trying this lifestyle eating foods that I enjoy so it doesn't seem like a diet. If I keep this up, I'll be able to stick with it for a long time. Hopefully forever!

Off to work I go.... eh.

Friday, June 5, 2009

What the Funk???

I'm in a funk today. Actually for the past couple of days. I'm irritated, withdrawn and I just don't feel like dealing with any friend drama. Truth is, I'm lonely. I wish I had someone to love and that loved me back. I started thinking earlier tonight (big mistake!) that it's been a really long time since I had someone truly love me. Like since the early 2000-2001. When I was in that relationship, I knew the guy loved me. I mean he REALLY loved me, I never had to question that, no matter what kind of troubles we had. I miss the consistency of knowing that no matter what, I was loved and that nobody would ever take my place. I've had relationships since then and I haven't had that feeling. It's a pretty depressing thought.

I wonder when I will have that again....or if I will have it. The worst part is, I'm not really up for "looking" for a guy right now, I'm still hung up on McS. I'm also trying to work on myself, physically and emotionally, so that I can be prepared for my next relationship. So my only choices here are to fake the funk for a while and put myself out there to meet new people. Or I can be lonely and wait for the next guy to cross my path that really moves me. Ugh, who knows.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

How's It Going?

I'm here to post quicklly about how things are going with my diet. They are actually going better than I ever imagined they would. I resisted doing low carb for so long because I was in the "Weight Watcher" frame of mind where I could have anything I want as long as I pay attention to the portions. I'm sure to an extent it's true......if I actually followed that plan. I think as I've gotten older, my body needed this change of pace. I feel better and sometimes I almost convince myself that these few days have magically made me thin (but then I look in the mirror). But still....I'm seeing good things.

I've been waking up even earlier to go to the gym, which has made me pretty tired at night. I think my body is still in "adjust" mode. I have not had any real cravings for carbs, as I thought I would especially at night. I don't miss potatoes or pasta....all they do is make me full and sleepy. Sometimes I go through periods where my stomach feels empty, even shortly after I've eaten. I don't like those periods. I've also started to drink water and have given up diet soda completely. I don't care what "they" say though (whoevery "they" is).....water does not make me full. It never has....in fact, when I'm drinking it that's when I feel empty sometimes. But then when I started chewing gum and actually had some flavor in my mouth, it got better.

Anyway all is good. This weekend will probably be the most challenging. Thankfully I don't have any picnics or BBQ's to go to so I won't have that temptation to deal with just yet. But I've been known to do great all week and blow it big time on the weekend. I am determined not to do that this time.